Phew! So, my first day in Osan was pretty hard-core. I kind of had a mini break-down (VERY mini) last night with Brook on Skype, mainly just because I was so overloaded with new information and so tired! So, I stayed with Rosie on Tuesday night, and she filled me in with lots of info about the apartment, buses, supermarkets, and so on. It was so amazingly good to have the overlap of me and her, so she could tell me exactly what the deal was, with no communication issues.
The next day, Wednesday, we woke up at 6.45 and got ready to catch the bus to school. I wasn’t allowed to eat anything because I was having my medical test. Rosie is a little disorganized, so we were a bit late to catch the bus, so we got a taxi instead. It wasn’t too expensive, I think it was about $12. So, we got to school and the bombardment began. I had to meet everyone, and kind of just smile and nod all day. Had a very quick and somewhat awkward meeting with the principal, where he spoke in Korean and I smiled. Then I was whipped back to Osan for two hours in the hospital being tested for I don’t know what. They looked in my mouth for about 20 seconds and told me I needed a wisdom tooth extracted… I am doubtful – I just went to the dentist in NZ and nothing was wrong at all. Then I had to pee in a cup, and other unmentionable things, followed by a chest x-ray (for TB I assume). Then I had a hearing test, and eye test, got measured and weighed, and had to give them a blood sample. Then I had to tell a doctor I wasn’t on any medication and didn’t have a mental disease. Not sure what most of those things had to do with teaching. Like, ok I can understand them not wanting me to have T..B., or be on drugs, or even want to make sure I can see and hear ok in the classroom… but why the heck check my teeth, or my height? Perhaps it’s just ‘protocol’ or something. I got through it, anyway, and was back at school in time for lunch.
Lunch is a classic cafeteria thing. I’ve never had lunch like that before. You line up with a metal tray and lunch ladies dump a spoon full of everything in the different holes. Yesterday there was kimchi, rice with spam, unknown processed patty things with tomato sauce, slightly spicy chewy noodles, and soup. Not sure if it was just because I was ridiculously hungry or what, but it all tasted actually ok. After lunch I got to observe Rosie teaching a couple of classes, which was great. I feel more comfortable with that side of things now. The co-teacher, MR Baek kept interrupting her and speaking for long stretches in Korean though. That might take me some patience to get used to, as I’m used to being the only teacher in the classroom – and I don’t think he should be using so much Korean in the English room. However, it is their system, and I’m really just a guest, so I will shut up and do what I’m told. Rosie said that the conversation classes are better. I’ll be teaching eight hours of them a week, and it’s all on my own, and all my own lesson planning. Because these students have such a low level of English, and the lessons are only 45 minutes long, there’s not too much to do in any one lesson anyway. I’m not over the moon about the teaching prospects, but things might improve as I get used to things. At least the students seem well mannered, happy, and nice.
So, I got a lot of information about how the school works and whatnot yesterday, which I have now mostly forgotten, but I think that’s ok. I think I’ve got most of the main stuff under control. Because it was Rosie’s last day, all her classes had made her goodbye posters and wanted photos with her. We finished work at 4.30, but didn’t actually get to leave until after 5. I was so tired by this point. Then we went to catch the bus, so she could show me how, but Mr Baek showed up and drove us home instead. So, we got home about 6pm, Rosie finished packing, and then I helped her carry her things to the bus station. Then I was all alone. I got back to the apartment ok, and made a quick stop at the convenience store on the way. I was too tired to go grocery shopping, and too heartsick to go out for dinner, so I bought a big bottle of Powerade and a kimbap triangle and ate it while skyping Brook. Rose also left behind a big cake, which I had some of. It was very nice!
I felt very down and very homesick yesterday night. The whole day was just overwhelming. I think because of the language barrier and the cultural differences everything felt very shallow and like ‘fake-caring’. I don’t know, perhaps that is how my culture shock will manifest itself. There was just too many smiles and too much faked (or so it seemed to me) emotions in the name of politeness. It made me feel very empty by the end of the day, like my whole day had been an act, and nothing ‘real’ had happened. I also suddenly felt very alone. But I skyped with Brook, and watched an episode of a new TV show, Terra Nova, and felt better. I’m still feeling a bit emotionally delicate, but am feeling like I can deal with it.
I don’t have to teach at all this week. I just have to go at the beginning of each class and introduce myself. I’m supposed to be making a powerpoint introducing myself and New Zealand, but the computer is all in Korean, so it’s slow going. Plus, I kind of already made one at home, so I think I’ll just expand that one. So, other than spending 5-10 minutes at the beginning of a few lessons today talking to the students, I don’t have a lot to do.
This school is about 25-35 minutes away from my new home, depending on the traffic. I caught the bus myself this morning, and made it here fine J. It is quite a small school, with only around 120-150 students, three grades with two classes per grade. This is nice because it means I don’t feel too lost, and with time I might start to recognize some of the kids. I have my own desk in the staffroom, and they have given me a laptop to use, but as I said, it’s all in Korean. I’ve also got a nice pile of English textbooks to use as resources. I’m actually very much looking forward to getting back into the classroom and having some sort of sense of purpose. I have a lot of free time during the day though, and not a whole lot of lesson planning to do, so I had better think of some safe for work kind of things to keep myself busy and entertained. I guess I can devote some time to my blog, some time to keeping up with friends, some time to learning Korean, and then other things.
On the subject of learning Korean, interestingly, I feel almost no enthusiasm to do so. Perhaps because I have so many other things on my mind, but I can’t really be bothered learning anything right now. I do definitely need to add some words to my vocab – sorry, excuse me, and some food words would be useful. If I can get the enthusiasm. Right now I just want to curl up on a couch (which I don’t have) and watch T.V. with Brook.
That brings me to the subject of my apartment. It is so much better than I had even hoped for. It’s fairly spacious, has heaps of storage space, and a separate shower. It definitely needs some work to make it feel like home, though. Rosie left a whole lot of crap behind that I need to throw away, like old makeup, old food, and so on, but the place is essentially very clean. I want to get some new, cozier bedding, put up/ display my souvenirs from China, and actually unpack my bags. At the moment I just have stuff strewn everywhere.
I’m in the process of organizing to meet up with one or more people off facebook this weekend, to try and make some friends. Or something. Lol, right now I really wish I hadn’t come to Korea, I feel very misplaced and alone. Thank goodness for the internet! Why did I want to come to Korea, anyway?
Well, I wanted an adventure. I wanted to see if I could go it alone. I wanted to try something new. I wanted to either get it out of my system, or learn that I want to keep teaching and travelling. I want to use the experience to be a better person. I want to learn to value what I have. I want to learn about the world, and learn to make myself happy.
Looking at that list, I feel better. I feel like there might be more of a point to this, and most importantly, a self-defined, and self-driven point. I think I start to feel bad when I lose my sense of control and direction. And also lose my sense of the bigger picture. If I can make it through this year, I will be so proud of myself. I’m not currently convinced that I can. It stretches out before me like a long and lonely black hole. I think this will change the more time I spend becoming familiar with things and make some friends. The possibility of making friends, or meeting new people and liking them, and them liking me, seems so distant and kind of impossible! I’ve never been good at consciously making friends, but now’s the time to start, I suppose! I plan to join a couple of exercise classes and try to take a few organized trips in the coming weekends to try and meet some people. Right now I just feel totally contrary and want all my old people J.
Ok, it was just lunch time – and what a relief, I was starving! The food was nice – the main dish was a brown beef and noodle something that tasted very similar to yakiniku. I really liked it. Then I went and sat outside where I was mobbed by a group of lovely first grade girls who wanted to try and talk to me. The sunshine did me a world of good, I think I should try to go outside every lunch time that I can. Otherwise I’ll just be stuck inside all day. Sounds like a plan J.
Ok, now a return to tradition, today’s top 5!:
1) The brown beef thing at lunch. Yummy!
2) I made it to school successfully on the bus.
3) Sitting in the sun at lunch time was great, and very relaxing.
4) I cooked my first dinner in my new home. It really doesn't feel like home though.
5) I don't know. I'm out of good things. I'm sad and lonely. This sucks.
